Thoughts on nursing B-Man

So as I alluded in either this blog or B-man's blog or the babymccool blog (?????) - I am still nursing B, but also struggling a little bit, especially now that I am pregnant. I kinda feel like a woman alone on an island doing this with lots of people saying - can you nurse while your preggo? How long are you going to nurse B? Don't you want a break? What if both are nursing when the newborn is here? And to all those responses I just am like- I don't know?! and thankfully I have a very supportive dr and I had an opportunity to meet with the lactation consultant who was also supportive. She suggested I read, "Mothering your Nursing Toddler" which I finally had a chance to pick up from the library last night. Okay- loving it so far! It is just nice to remember that you are not alone in the "extended" nursing - and I know that there are lots of us out there - just look at the other blogs I link to and it is clear - but with the people I am immediately surrounded with, I am somewhat alone. Of my close girlfriends, I can only think of 1 who is nursing past 1 year.

Well, just reading this book last night, or the little that I have read so far, has reiterated to me that I am making the right choice for Brennan and I. Of course I was slightly put off by the introduction when the author insinuated that mother's should stay home and that we were doing a disservice to our child otherwise, but I know our situation is working fine. I also realize that as a result of this choice to work, that B needs me even more when I am home - which is probably why he nurses so much. I had also hoped to take time over this break to try to get him to sleep longer or all night in his crib, but I am rethinking that. It is hard to hear about babies who sleep all night, but again, I think that as a function of my working and B not having mommy-time during the day, we experience more night waking and more cuddle time at night. I don't know that I am ready to take that away from him. We don't nurse a lot throughout the night - except last night since he woke up in a screaming fit at 2am and it was all I could do to calm him - either night terror or teething - who knows. We nursed again at 6am. It works. I sleep enough and am happy with our situation. I also need to just stop comparing myself to other families - b/c I am making choices that work for us and therefore shouldn't expect something of my son that isn't consistent with the other messages I am sending. you know?!

Anyway - I am excited to continue reading. I am also hoping that with the New Year I can find time to attend the evening La Leche League meetings for additional support, especially now that I am pregnant and just trying to navigate thru the second year of nursing. The nursing relationship is so special and I am not willing to give it up, nor do I think Brennan is. We are going with child-wed weaning, with some prompting from momma (like the time when I had to stop the all-night nursing buffet since it was interfereing with my sleep!) and I think as time goes on, we'll both make decisions regarding what works and what doesn't!

I'm rambling. Keep you posted on the new things I learn from my book.
Happy New Year.

Oh - plan to post a pic soon of me nursing B - it is from his Birthday in September. I know this is crazy, but I am nervous to post it!

News to share!

http://mccoolbaby.blogspot.com/

My sister's wedding

I love weddings! My sister, Courtney, is getting married this coming September - so exciting - at a really cool venue in STL called Oliva - check it out! And I'm in the wedding - even better!
http://cateringstlouis.com/weddings/loc_oliva.php

What a great guy

I have to say - I have a really great husband. So this past week I have been battling the never ending stomach virus - kept me in bed for over 24 hours, and after 1 week I can still hardly eat. Nice. But, PJ has totally pulled double duty - nighttime parenting, bed time, bathtime, grocery shopping, cooking, everything but cleaning (we won't go there!) - I don't think he realizes how much I appreciate it. I do. :)

Though as a result of my illness, my milk supply has totally decreased and there have been days over the past week that B-man has not wanted me at all and has preferred getting a bottle from daddy - consistent and fills his belly - though I think we are on the turnaround - I know it had to do with the fact that I could not even drink anything for a while! Maybe 1 sprite a day - now we are building up....slowly but surely - wonder if I'll ever want to eat dinner again though.

I have to say, I have wanted to eat very weird things since i have been ill - chicken mcnuggets, sweets, chocolate shakes, french fries - only the greasy stuff!

My bro

Here is a pic of Pat - he got his Christmas present that Court and Andrew and I sent to him - a webcam, lots of coffee, random food items that you can't buy in that part of the world, and lots of random DVDs! Hopefully it will help get him thru the LONG LONG COLD LONG COLD LONG COLD Mongolia winter... We love and miss you Patrick!

Ditch Plastics

Okay - a new challenge from the Crunchy Domestic Goddess - remember the challenge in August to use less water (I still try to take shorter showers) - we now have a challenge to DITCH THE PLASTICS - this is more than just ditching plastic bags (though that's a start!) - let's give it a try during this holiday season!

http://crunchydomesticgoddess.com/2008/11/11/the-no-plastic-holiday-challenge/#comment-16534

A new Brennan joining the family!

Well, we already have one Brennan in our family, but that number is about to double! My sister Courtney got engaged over the weekend to her Brennan! I am SOOOO excited about this news and cannot wait. Not to mention little B-Man and I get to be in the wedding! We don't have a date yet, but soon enough we will - especially if I know my sister - planning is occuring as I type! YAY!

new blog backgrounds

Check out my new fun backgrounds on this blog and B-Mans blog - it is from, thecutestblogontheblock.com. Click on the left hand side of the blog to access - super easy to use and to put in whatever template you prefer!

Continuing to Nurse

So I am hoping that before Brennan turns two or so, we can provide a little brother or sister for him. And as I discuss this, many people often ask me the same thing - are you going to keep nursing Brennan if you get pregnant? And I always reply - of course! Why wouldn't I?

Here is an interesting article about breastfeeding and pregnancy from the La Leche League website: http://www.llli.org/llleaderweb/LV/LVMayJun95p35.html

Here are some excerpts:
"as most women report a reduction of milk supply during pregnancy while nursing an older baby. While noting that some mothers find it necessary to consume extra calories while breastfeeding during pregnancy, THE BREASTFEEDING ANSWER BOOK reminds us that a well-nourished mother should have no difficulty providing for both the unborn baby and the nursing child if he is more than a year old. If the nursling is younger, the mother will need to watch his weight gain and provide additional solid foods as needed if her milk is not sufficient."

Also - I anticipate that depending on if and when Brennan wants to wean, I may be a tandem nursing mother - in other words, nursing two at once! Granted, a newborns nutritional needs are much greater than that of a toddlers, but I am confident that my body will respond as necessary.
Here are a bunch of articles about tandem nursing - nursing both a newborn and a toddler:
http://www.llli.org/NB/NBtandem.html

Needless to say, who knew I would nurse this long - I don't see myself stopping anytime soon and I guess when I get pregnant, we'll just see what happens!

Remembering Grandpa

Sad. My grandfather passed away yesterday. Here are some great pics of B-man and Great Grandpa Meyer from two trips home this summer.

Calling all lurkers!

You'll see I have a new feature called FOLLOWERS! Try it!

Food for thought....

http://www.mama-is.com/white-privilege-family-values-and-sarah-palin/
Interesting - and if you have never thought about White Privilege or Christian Privilege - it is real, not something that a bunch of people just made up to prove a point. This is a topic we studied heavily, along with other diversity issues, when I was in graduate school. There are a lot of articles out there about it. This particular link is related to the upcoming presidential election, but if you google either topic, you are bound to find many articles about the two topics. It is okay to embrace the fact that they are real - and the sooner we all admit it, the faster we can bring about change!

It's been a while!

Sorry it's been a while! You can always tell the fall semester is in full swing b/c it means NO TIME for anything! Work is absolutely crazy!

Not much has been on my mind lately - except my grandfather (not doing well) and school. Yes, school. I am (GULP) thinking about going back. And realized today I need to think quick! Priority deadline for the program I am considering is Dec 1! Which means getting the GRE done very soon(AGAIN - I am passed the timeframe to use my previous scores!).

PhD or EdD? Oh - I am nervous about this....but need to do it. Time to start the research.

On a breastfeeding note - I am PROUD to say that we have surpassed the one year mark, with no signs of slowing down! I proudly wear my shirt from the Indiana State Fair Lactation Station that states HUMAN MILK FOR HUMAN BABIES. Comfy and light - good for running! Anyway - let's reflect on nursing past one year...

Remember the days of feeding all the time - every hour for B-man! And remember when my milk was his only source of nutrition? And now look where we are - he eats three meals a day, plus snacks. And likes to drink whole milk at daycare. I am no longer pumping - which is nice. But we nurse when we get home in the evening - though the duration is significantly shortened lately - I wonder if it is more for comfort. And then by bedtime, B is ready for a nursing down to sleep opportunity. He still nurses 1-2x at night - which is fine with me. I love the family bed (and wish my husband loved it as much as me!). And b/c B has cut down overnight nursing, we now have a nursing session in the AM before I go to work. So we nurse anywhere from 3-4x a day - pretty good for a 1 year old! I plan to continue following his cues for what he needs. I have noticed that on the weekends he likes to nurse more often, presumably b/c I am around more often!

So I am trying to introduce the sign for nursing (think about making a fist and then opening and closing it - like you were squeezing something or nursing a cow!) - and while he doesn't do it - when I ask him if he wants to nurse and make the sign, he always responds with a MMMMMMM very loudly if he is interested! He still roots around as well. And lately has taken comfort in placing his hand right on my (clear my throat) - nip. Sorry if that is offensive, but I don't know how else to say it! I am clothed - it is just where he prefers to have his hand! He's only 1 and he knows what he likes!!!!

Too cute - so unrelated to nursing - Brennan has started brushing his teeth - all 4 of them! Well, really I brush them with water on his toothbrush, but he likes to help - and often in his eagerness, he then opts to brush my hair with his toothbrush. It is tooooo cute!

One more thing - totally unrelated to Brennan at all! GOOD NEWS - after numerous appeals and lots of letter writing - insurance WILL PAY for the remainder of my plastic surgery bill. Now, I am still waiting to actually have it happen, but it is in writing that it will happen. Thank goodess - that saves us about $4500!!!!!!! I met with the plastic surgeon this week (in case you didn't know, I was bitten by a dog on my face last year, 37 weeks prego - lots of stitches!!!) and he thinks I am healing well. Initially he wanted to give the healing 1 year before we discussed any additional measures. Now he wants to wait another 6 months - he thinks I am still healing. But we discussed possibly cutting out some of the fattier tissue that still looks swollen. It makes me nervous b/c it is my face, but he did such a great job to begin with , that we'll just see. I have high hopes for the final outcome!

Blog about Bag Slings

I thought that this was interesting. I don't have a bag sling, I use an Ergo which I love!
http://babyslingsafety.blogspot.com/2008/05/concerns-about-bag-slings.html

Interesting Blog

This was sent to me by a friend.....still processing it all and forming my views

http://womenagainstsarahpalin.blogspot.com/

Okay, seriously

So yesterday I am listening to NPR and I wanted to reach thru the radio and throttle this woman. They were having a roundtable discussion with people about McCain and Obama - and while it was very interested, one thing just really got me fired up.

So this lady is talking about how she doesn't trust Obama b/c he is a Muslim and that Muslims, even if they claim to not be Muslim's are ONLY no longer muslim's when they are dead. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! First off, time and time again, Obama, who claims to be a Christian, has stated that he was not a Muslim. And if he was - why should/would anyone care (yes I know, people do - which is so ridic). Like being photographed in Muslim garb means anything - it doesn't! Haven't we all dressed up for one reason or another in soemthing that might not represent us (Hello halloween!). I love how people claim tolerance, but hold some random bias against someone. And do they forget the reason America was founded - the home of the free - as a result of religious persecution - and yet, here we go again - persecuting people for something that may or may not be - and makes no difference anyway. Seperation of Church and State. Period.

not to mention - does Obama have any choice in his middle name? NO! It was what his parents DECIDED!!!! HELLO PEOPLE!!! And I guarantee you, if at some point in his life he had opted to change his middle name legally - he would be getting blasted for that - for denying his heritage and crap. God - this election is just killing me.

And while I cannot claim to be entirely knowledgeable about the candidates, I do know that Palin - whoa, not my girl - our values are about as different as they can be. Great, we're both working mom with brown hair - the similarities stop there. I'm just crossing my fingers for November...

People - please vote. Register. Vote. Register. Vote.

Working out - staying healthy

So I have a new goal - to work out at least 3X/week. Run/Walk twice and go to Pilates once.

If you know me, you are probably thinking - WHAT - why so little Kyle? So before I go in to that, let's talk about my workout (and some nutrition) "history"........

HS - ran XC and Track - worked out all the time at the YMCA, lifted weights, did cardio, ran, etc.....fanatic about eating - never ate cheese and monitored my fat intake....

College - joined the Rowing Team in an attempt to stay in shape. If I thought I worked out a lot in HS, that was nothing compared to college. In addition to daily workouts, which included lifting 2-3x/week, I worked out on my own (or rather, with two of my good friends on the team who were just as fanatic about it as I was!). We did cardio every day and did AT LEAST 1000 crunches. I was obsessed with what I ate and fearful of gaining the "freshman 15". Granted, I had not problem taking down too much alcohol. Whatever.

Post College - 1 year out - still ran tons and lifted. Started doing marathons.

Post post college - still worked out - but not as much. Decided that I hated lifting weights, so I rarely did. Became much less obsessed about what I ate. Guess what, I didn't change sizes either!

Pre-baby - did Pilates 1x/week, ran a few times a week.........

Post baby - well, that's where we are now. Remember, prior to Brennan being born I qualified for the Boston Marathon and in my pre-baby state of mind was 100% sure that I would pop him out and start running and doing the crazy marathon training. Then B was born and I had the epiphany. Pre-baby I was so worried about losing the baby weight......thank god for breastfeeding. I hardly work out, hence the new goal.

So I started my new workout regimen two weeks ago. Let's see, today is Thursday and I ran Tuesday evening - are you kidding me, I am still sore! Only went a very slow 3 miles (granted, with baby and dog in tow!) then did some lunges afterward. Oh, this is going to be a long road.

But - I feel great - despite the soreness. And I hope I can continue my plan! Honestly, it is HARD to find time to work out - I never thought I would have such an excuse....but my days go like this:
Wake up at 5:45am......at work 7:30-4....pick up Brennan at 4:30.....get home by 5pm.....nurse Brennan....play/start dinner/feed Tucker.....dinner....Bathe Brennan.....Brennan goes to bed by 7:30-8pm......do dishes......do other stuff around the house......crash into bed.......

So when will I fit in working out.....
Okay - run 1-2 times over the weekend, go to Pilates 1x/week, and then pick just one night after work to run with Bman and Tucker....I think I can do it, until it starts getting dark at 5:30.

The good thing about this all, while not working out isn't as great for my heart - thankfully due to good genes and extended breastfeeding, I am the same size I was before, though proportioned a little bit differently.....who isn't post baby?!
K

Wordless Wednesday

When to wean...

I have been thinking a lot about weaning lately - not b/c I am doing it, but b/c a lot of the other moms I know have babies around Brennan's age and slowly but surely, everyone seems to be weaning!

So I first have to say that I have a friend who was unable to breastfeed - and it was a trying and upsetting experience for her. I was so proud of her determination and then the process she went through accepting what was - that it was not meant to be. I give her KUDOS for honestly trying - and I can honestly say that she did not just give up without going into details of the situation. You know who you are.... I know you are reading........I think what you did and are doing is GREAT!

Besides that example, most of the moms that I interact with are breastfeeding moms. I am a part of a playgroup and our babies are all around the same age. And then I have a few other mom friends. I guess I thought we would just all nurse forever. But I was wrong. Now that our babies are hitting a year+, people are weaning (not all - there is about 1/2 of the group still nursing). And it just makes me sad. Of course, I hate being asked the question - so how long are you going to nurse? Because I honestly don't know. I just don't believe in mother-led weaning for my family. Brennan is no where near giving up the boobie - and I will indulge him in his comfort and source of nutrition. I love nursing him - it means so much to me. And I can't help but feel sad for the other babies whose moms are making a different choice. And I shouldn't judge and try not to - we all have different situations and I understand why they are making their decisions, but I still feel sad for baby. There are a variety of reasons that mom's choose to wean - teething, inability to pump at work (despite laws that protect and give the right), they hit their goal of 6-12 months, production issues, they get tired of it......whatever.

I guess b/c I never give Brennan a bottle, I don't even know how I would wean if I wanted to. It just doesn't seem like something I could or would do. And how would I? I would have the most unhappy child and I love that i have such a happy child! We'll see what happens in October when I am gone for three nights - but I will pump and at night Brennan will still get mommies milk, just from a bottle via daddy......during the day he is now getting whole milk b/c I am no longer pumping (thank goodness - I was tired of it - so I guess I can see how other mother's make that choice to stop).

Anyway - there is no right or wrong answer. I believe in child-led weaning. We all have the right to make the choice that is best for our situation, our family, our child, and ourself (which is a very important part of the equation!).

Wordless Wednesday

Getting old sucks

So pretty much, getting old sucks. Or stinks is the word my grandma used. It is so sad - my grandfather Meyer is failing. just a year ago, he was more frail than he had ever been, but for an 85 year old was in amazing shape - he had an active social life, went to the gym a few times a week and did cardio and weights with a trainer, was stimulated intellectually, and was the epitome of good grooming. And now, in a matter of weeks, he can hardly walk without the help of a walker, is not able to shave, is disheveled, cannot remember things. It sucks. Really sucks. The doctor says he has acute dimentia - so pretty much we can only expect things to go downhill. He goes from being lucid to not, and then stares off into space. In the middle of a conversation, he may all of a sudden look confused and wonder what you are talking about. The worst part is, he knows his mind and body are failing and he cannot do anything about it. He hates it. I hate it. My family hates it. My poor grandma - it is really hard on her. It is really hard on my mom and aunts too. It makes me sad.

I was fortunate enough to visit him over the weekend with Brennan. Two of my cousins also came in town - so that was good.

keep him in your thoughts and prayers.

Amazing Birth Story and the Lactation Station

This about brought me to tears. I can only hope that the next time I give birth it is this amazing! http://davidandcorin.blogspot.com/2008/08/levis-birth.html

This weekend I had such a great experience! I volunteered at the Indiana Mother's Milk Bank Lactation Station at the Indiana State Fair. I am hoping to donate some milk too, but we are kinda getting to point that what I am producing isn't quite right for the new little ones. Anyway, it is such a great thing. There were three Lactation Stations at the fair for Nursing Mothers. Cracker Barrell donated nice rocking chairs and there was bottled water and a changing station and lots of information. It was a nice place to quietly nurse a baby out of the hot sun! There were some mothers that took advantage of it while I was there and lots more mothers that used the changing station (and even some dads!). I was so glad to see such an accomodation. Not to mention, what a great way to get the word out about the Milk Bank. Did you know, there are only 10 milk banks in the nation! The one in Indiana serves a lot of the midwest. The breastmilk is pastuerized and cleaned just like cow's milk (for any of you that were wondering or say ewwww) so it is safe for any infant. Mother's do have a blood test and the milk is tested again before it is used to ensure that there is nothing that would be harmful passed on. So glad I could help! Brennan joined me and was a hit with the other volunteers!

Wordless Wednesday - on Tuesdau

Is it really that wise to be "Babywise"

So I had an opportunity to glance at the book, "Becoming Babywise". Are you kidding me - that book made me out to be the WORST kind of parent ever. How dare I breastfeed on demand and rock my child to sleep, respond to his cries, and participate in babywearing.

Okay, so I flipped to the chapter that was for parents who did not start the "training" with Day 1 (and who the hell starts training a newborn - yikes yikes yikes yikes - nothing like altering nature from the get go!) - and two of the things it told me were to Stop breastfeeding my child to sleep immediately and to prepare for some very long nights of crying. Why I am wondering, would any sane parent want to read on? But I was curious to some other things they said, so I flipped through some other parts.

I had to laugh - outloud mind you, when I got to the two test families - I mean, talk about extreme cases. Basically it boils down to the fact, that according to this book, I am going to have an overweight child with no confidence. Yes, that is correct. By choosing to breastfeed on demand, he is learning to eat whenever he pleases (let's not take into account that most babies eat WHEN THEY ARE HUNGRY and are excellent at self-regulating their intake unlike adults!). And that b/c I choose to NOT let him CIO (cry it out) and choose to partake in babywearing, I am not allowing him to develop his self confidence. I love it, just love it. Brennan, the most confident little boy, who is happy with just about anyone, loves exploring, loves trying new foods, and is happy to turn down food when full. Oh, and the book loved to use a phrase similar to, "Those attachment parenting parents...." and then proceed to put people who subscribe to AP down. Seriously. Thank goodness no one has recommended I read it.

In fact, I was discussing the book with another friend today, who is much more APish than I am and she told me that in her former life as a Family Educator, they often encouraged parents to STAY AWAY from the book and also noted that it has a cult-like following. Scary. What ever happened to following instinct and doing what feels right and natural?

On a happy sleep note - Brennan slept great in Arkansas - so great that I have attempted to mimic the room there - complete with darker curtains and a new loud fan! So far so good - naps were amazing today! And no wake ups tonight yet!

Wordless Wednesday (on Thursday)

Feeling lucky

So I am sure that most moms wish they had more time with their little ones, especially those of us working full-time, but I have to say, I feel really lucky with my work environment. Here are a few reasons why:

• FMLA Flexibility - when I had Brennan, I opted for 8 weeks off full time and 8 weeks part time, which used my 12 weeks of FMLA (of course it totally sucks that IU does not have short term disability availabe, which equates to what most of us know as paid maternity leave - yes, FMLA is time off, but not paid - you have to use PTO time!)
• Flexible working schedule - I have had no problems working my schedule around the way I need to - shorter lunch, leave early, working longer some days to work less others - as long as I am available for students, get my work done, and get my time in!
• No issues with pumping at work - I am blessed to have a private office with a door that locks (though I did get walked in on once!) - but never have I had an issue pumping at work. People just know not to disturb when my door window is covered. And I just have worked it in to my schedule (and gotten to be a good one-handed typer!). To be honest, I never really asked if it would be okay, just assumed it would be and it has not been a problem.
• Daycare is closed this week and next - but no problem. First off I have such fantastic family members who were all chomping at the bit to get some time with B-Man. Courtney came M-W morning and my FIL came R and F. Wed afternoon we were in a small bind, but I just had Court bring him to my work and it worked out! I love my co-workers. They took Brennan on walks and to play while I met with students and other times he just played in my office and had lunch with me. It was so so so great!

My hope is that IU does get short term disability soon - though my hopes are not high on this one! Really, I wish that nationally we had a policy on this. How I wish we were more like European nations that get PAID maternity leave outside of their PTO and for an extended amount of time - like 6 months!

Wordless Wednesday

note - I am now participating in Wordless Wednesday - who knew it was a blog thing?!

Ergo Baby

Yay for the Ergo - love it! Need to post a pic of Mr. B and I using it!

My internal religion debate

Lil B-man is not babtized and it causes me mixed feelings. I want him to be, because his father and I both are, but I am also not sure what my thoughts are on religion anymore. This has been an issue that I have found myself struggling with for quite a while - I ask myself questions like, Do I want to go to church? If so, which one? What do I believe? Can I challenge what is mainstream? Maybe I don't believe in God? Do I believe in God? Maybe I am a UU (unitarian universalist)? If so, should I join a UU church? Do I want to give up my Sunday mornings? If I don't does that make me selfish? What are the real reasons I think I might want to belong to something? How do I know what religion I should be? Do I want my son to be brought up in a church? If so, what values do I want him taught?

PJ does not and will not ever go to a church. I knew that when I met him and when I married him. I respect his opinion and view on the matter. I was raised in a variety of religion experiences - Catholic, Congregational, Presbyterian, United Methodist. Here is the deal - I am not tolerant of intolerance (oxy moron huh?!). I want everyone to be free to think and believe in what they want to believe in. I want everyone to love who they choose without persecution. I want children to be free to make their own decisions on topics such as religion and other social issues. So there is my issue. Where do I fit? If I choose UU, am I ready to say that I believe in the idea of Jesus and that he was a good man with good lessons, but not Jesus as a savior? Am I okay thinking that God may be something we have created that fits within the unknown world to make answering certain issues and dealing with certain things easier in this crazy world?

Honestly, when I think about what UUs believe, a lot of it really resonates with me. But perhaps if I found a very liberal Christian church, that will work too. UUs are a break off of Christianity, so often the services are similar and they celebrate the spirit of holidays, which I love. There is a United Methodist Church a few miles from my house that borders a downtown area that I want to try - I have heard it is very open-minded, very accepting of all people, and very service oriented. I love that! The UU church that I tried was not a good fit and there is another that I want to try, but I just haven't found a weekend that I am willing to give up my time.

No answers are coming anytime soon on this topic - it may be something that I struggle with forever - I pretty much know what I don't want, and know what I want others to be free to do, but not quite sure how it all fits with me and what works for my life. And really, for B-man too - I cannot leave him out of this equation!

Vaccine Article

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/pediatricks/vacc2008.asp Check this article out - he also references another vaccine authority.

Vaccines and Doctors

I have to say, I have the most supportive medical people in my life. I feel very blessed. Going back a little bit.....when I found out I was pregnant, PJ and I had a conversation about what kind of doctor we wanted to use. I was pushing for either our family doctor (who specialized in maternity care) or a mid-wife. PJ wasn't 100% comfortable with either option and really wanted me to use a standard OB-GYN. I was hesistant. I knew that I wanted to attempt to have a natural birth and wanted to have someone involved with us that would support this choice. At the time I was also leaning toward a water birth. I spoke to my doctor who suggested another doctor in the practice who WAS more of an OB-GYN but also a Family Practice Doctor. So we went with her. It was a great relationship. She actually went on maternity leave during my pregnancy, so sneaky me got to revert back to seeing my family doctor. Luckily the hospital that the practice delivers at is one of the more open-minded in Indiana (a hospital in which the word FORMULA was never even mentioned around me, let alone offered, a hospital where I was encouraged to room-in, a hospital in which there were lactation consultants ready at my call, a hospital that allowed me to be released MUCH sooner than normal for a c-section), which was important to me. I had the option of bringing in my birth plan and having it read and adhered to (which it was!) and had the option of having a room with a birthing tub (which we got!). Unfortunately, my labor ended in a c-section thanks to Brennan being Frank Breach (Click HERE to read the story).We knew that in the hospital we did not want Brennan to get any medications - no Hep shots, no vitamin K - we just didn't think it was necessary. Again, we were thankful to have supportive doctors.We have also opted into an alternative vaccination schedule. Brennan sees our family doctor - so no, we do not see an official pediatrician, though there is one in the practice should we need him. But, thankfully we have a healthy son.PJ and I pride ourselves on being informed parents. So here is my opinion on that...Too many people take what their doctors say to be gospel. I trust my doctor and we have a very positive relationship with him. BUT, we don't always agree with him and we have the kind of doctor/patient relationship that is open and therefore we are happy to share our opinions. I wish more people took an active role in their health. While we should not self-diagnose or never recieve medical care - doing research should be encouraged. There is never one right way or wrong way to handle a situation. There are always numerous ways and situation specifics may alter options. Doctors are human and have opinions - there opinions are based on their schooling, current research, and of course their own experiences. Those things cannot make anyone option the ONLY or BEST. For example, take introducing solids. My goodness, there is a lot of information out there. So many people I know go strictly off of what their doctor says. I am not indicating that is wrong, but it makes me sad. Who says that the doctor is correct. Is he up on all the research? Considering that there are so many alternatives and ways to introduce solids, can there really be one RIGHT way b/c the doctor says so? Too many people think that is how it should be.As parents, shouldn't we have the right and shouldn't our doctors expect us to question them and come in with our own opinons and research? I believe that it is our DUTY as parents to make informed decisions - not blindly go along with whatever the doctor says.And on to vaccines. Vaccines are a HOT TOPIC in children's medicine right now. There is no denying that vaccines save lives. There is not denying that they are a beneficial part of society. BUT BUT BUT - just because the AAP recommends a vaccination schedule - is that how it HAS to be? PJ and I opted to read the Vaccine Book by Dr. Sears, which was so informative. We made decisions based on our research from that book, our personal feelings, and through discussions with our doctor. We know that society views us as doing things the "strange" way, but honestly, we don't care. Our doctor swears that vaccines aren't linked to autism or that they are not the cause. We are not so sure. Yes, research can say that there is not a link but other studies point to the opposite conclusion. Who's right? Of course there are lots of variables to consider in studies as well (such as WHO IS FUNDING THE STUDY?!).Anyway, so far, Brennan has only recieved vaccines for three things - PC, DTaP, and HIB. We are delaying or opting out of all others. Why does my child need Hep A and B right now when those are sexually trasmitted or through IV Drug use? Why the chickenpox vaccine when there is no proof that the vaccine lasts forever when actually getting chicken pox does equal life long immunity. There are too many questions and variables with vaccines. We want to wait to see what happens with the research before we proceed. Thankfully our daycare situations have also been supportive of this choice. Anyway - bottom line - do your own research - read - don't take any word as gospel - make informed decisions that YOU and your family feel comfortable with!

A quickie.....

im-having-a-quickie-the-five-minute-shower-challenge

Consider joining me in this challenge!

Blogging...

So lately I have really become more into blogging. I love finding new blogs and reading what other people have to say - I feel like I can learn so much! So I have to give kudos to my college friend, Maria, who really is a blogging inspiration to me! She keeps about 3 blogs updated all the time. I love reading them. Seriously, what she links to and discusses has encouraged me to get out there and ready more. Though I don't know how she finds the time - working, being a mom, doing stuff with our alma mater, it's crazy! Maria - how do you do it?!

Anyway, I have posted some blogs that I like to frequent on my main page - they show the first few lines of the blogs so you can see any updates quickly and then click on them to read further.

The world of blogging is really an amazing network - so many of us are out there, linking to each other and back around again.

Some future blogs:

As I was getting ready this morning, I thought of some things I want to write about, so I am putting them on here so I don't forget:
Vaccines
making informed decisions - aka, not always taking the dr's word to be the word of god!
The shower challenge
other blogs and how I am inspired
random mom thoughts
promoting breastfeeding
birthing choices

So this blog is really a mom blog I have decided.....not just a whatever blog. So Brennan's blog is turning more into a page about him, but this blog is more of my general thoughts....I think that is how I am organizing it...

on the edge

Last night was a nightmare. I am still recovering from the 3+ hour time difference with Cali and on top of it, Brennan's top two teeth are about to emerge and he is struggling. Which means less sleep. Which means I am struggling. Which means I am on the verge of a breakdown.

Last night I started doing the sleep logs from Elizabeth Pantley's books, but was so tired that I failed from midnight to 5am- and there were way more wakeups than I would like to imagine. I am gearing up for tonight, though honestly, not sure i am ready to tackle a new plan until I get a 1/2 decent night's sleep b/c I am guessing that as soon as we start the new plan, for a while things will be rough. No crying of course, but just more patience, less sleep, and some new strategies.

oh, and I turn 30 on Sun.

oh, and Mr B fell out of my bed last night. Who feels like the crappy mom? Awesome.

A milk making machine!

That's me - a milk making machine - I seriosly seem to have an endless supply!

I was pumping 2-3 times a day, but b/c B is eating more and more solids during the day, I cut back to once. Well, pumping 2-3 yimes a day yielded about 16-18 oz and only pumping 1x/day still gets me 12-16oz! Way more than he is eating at daycare!

The downside the less pumping means I've lost some of the boobie (they are slowly shrinking!) and got my period again. DANG! It was so great to not have that for almost 20 months!

I know that oothers struggle w/ supply, so in no way am I complaining, but isn't nature strange? Some of us have an adundance of milk while others lack making just enough. Life's not fair like that and it sucks!

Baby Carriers and Slings

To help others, I thought I would do a little mom research on Baby Carriers and Slings. I love "baby-wearing" Brennan, but am struggling with the fact that he has outgrown the Bjorn and the sling is uncomfortable. My my b-day (yes, the big 3-0!) I am going to get a Baby Ergo (www.ergobabycarriers.com) which I am THRILLED about - you can do a side carry, front carry, or back carry. I think this will be great! Brennan loves to be worn over the stroller and it is so much easier than a stroller, so yay, great plan!

Here are some thoughts from fellow mommies:
OPINION 1:
I should add though-- the mei tei is now my absolute favorite. My son even falls asleep in it, and he hasn't fallen asleep in a sling/while being worn for over a year! Amazing! He gets REALLY excited when I pull it out. He is still in love too. :)

As you can see, I'm still wearing my baby at 17 (almost 18...YIKES) months, and I will continue to do so for as long as we both like it. Hmm... sounds like my bf philosophy all over again.

Long and the short summary of the writing below-- starting over, I would only own a ring sling and a mei tei. :)

AND CONTINUING from a previous message -
______________
I did the Bjorn, Hotsling, baby k'tan, ring sling and now mei tei. The Hotsling was nice for when The Boy was smaller, but as he grew, it became rather uncomfortable. The k'tan is ok, but it is too much like the Bjorn, and he doesn't seem to really like it. If you want to give it a try, I'd be happy to send it to you.

I do have a ring sling, which I absolutely love for quick shopping trips and the Farmer's market and things like that. Easy in, easy out, has a pocket... he likes it.

The mei tei is absolutely awesome. I am still working on efficiency in putting him in the thing, but I think a few more tries, and I will be able to do it like a pro. I have been using it primarily for back carry, but when he is tired and we're out, I will put it on in the front for him to fall asleep. The straps on mine are lightly padded, so that adds to the comfort, and from what I have read, the positioning is easier on baby's hips and lower back than the Bjorn (which has a lot of crotch pressure). I loved my Bjorn, don't get me wrong, but now that I know about the mei tei... I'm a complete convert. Another thing that I really like is that unlike traditional wraps, there is a semi-structured body, so it is easier for me to get it on right from the start.

If I were starting over again, I would only every own a ring sling and mei tei. The mei tei I own is a home made one by a LLL Mother-to-Mother forum member that i met online. I also purchased one of her ring slings as a gift for a mom-to-be. Both are high quality and I would definitely order from her again, so if you are interested, I will pass on her information to you.

I'm not sure what else you want to know about he mei tei, but I can tell you that he LOVES it-- riding on my back, he giggles and has a good time and can snuggle in when he needs that too...and I get "stuff" done! _______________________

OPINION 2:
As a mommy of another "healthy" boy I thought I'd weigh (ha!) in.

I started out with a ring-less sling - a hotsling. I liked it a lot when he was small. He would always fall asleep in it. I stopped using it when he was probably around maybe 4-6 months old because he got too big for the way I was using it and I never really masted the side or back carry.

I also have a mei tai that I really like and still use from time to time - keep in mind, my son is over 26 pounds. I still haven't really got the hang of the back carry which would probably be a better way to carry him at this point, but he doesn't mind the front, face-to-face carry for short trips into a store. He would also fall asleep in it a lot when he was younger.

I guess I would recommend both the sling and mei tai. The thing I'm not crazy about with the mei tai is that it's not so easy to get on your back which I would like to do. I got mind from BabyHawk.com. It's a pretty cool site and you can completely customize the carrier with different colors, patterns, and even add extra padding, and pockets with zippers. I would add the zippered pocket which I don't have on mine but think it would be nice to hold your keys and a few bucks when you run into a store. It is a pain to have to carry him in it and try to carry a bag as well.

OPINION 3:
Ring sling and Ergo get my vote. As you know I still wear my daughter often (nearly daily) and she is almost 10 mo. No plans to stop. If you had to pick one I think the ergo has more options and is more comfortable. Pros: baby is right up to your skin (unlike Bjorn), it is designed to not hurt there legs (unlike Bjorn). It has an infant insert for $25 so you can use with newborn. My husband didnt like it for newborn he never got use to it but I did. Now that she is so big I use the ergo almost exclusively. It goes on front, side and back. I use front and back most often and she loves being it. Oh ergos are dad friendly too.

OPINION 4:
I'm not much help on this topic because I never used anything really. I had a Baby Bjorn but I think I used it twice -- just around the house while doing laundry. I have a feeling that I will use it more with the next baby since I'll be needing to keep up with my first son too. I'll probably stick with the Bjorn since I already have it.

OPINION 5:
I love my Ergo baby...you have to order them on the internet...IT IS awesome!! Very vesitile up to 45 pounds i think, good luck!

OPINION 6:
My only experience is with the Baby Bjorn, which I liked. We used/use a great little stroller when we're out and about running errands and stuff.

THANKS MOMMIES! Hopefully your experiences will help other mommies as well. There are so many baby wearing options out there and the options can be overwhelming. From the small survey I did it seems the top choices are:
Baby Bjorn
Ring Sling
Mei Tai
Baby Ergo

Happy Wearing!

Why that title?

I wanted to name my blog, Kyle the Girl but believe it or not, someone had already done so! So I thought, what is it that I always say? And then it hit me, whenever I introduce myself I say, "Hi, my name is Kyle - you know, like the boy's name, but I'm a girl" which tends to get a smile or maybe a laugh (yet too long for a blog address, hence it being www.thegirlkyle.blogspot.com). Anyway, it seemed like a good name for my blog. Not too descriptive, but interesting. Doesn't convey any particular subject for the blog, but just whatever! Enjoy my new blog!